3 sleeps

So in just 3 4 more days 3 more sleeps I start the long trek home. It scares me to death as I just dont know if I am mentally ready to face all that I need too. Mostly i think I am still not sure what I want to tell all the ppl who will ask me how Donn is and if I had a wonderful holiday. Everything just seems so cloudy maybe thats why the weather has been so bad perhaps its a reflection of my doomy thoughts. However in saying that the sun is finally shining today and it looks so beautiful outside. So maybe again as so many times in the past I need to remind myself of all the blessings in my life and remind myself I only have to deal with one moment/ one day at a time I dont have to solve every problem I am likely to face in the next 10 yrs right now in this very second.
I just hate the torment the feeling of always having to try and be in two places at once and never really making anyone happy including myself.
There are many changes I need to make and the first one being to get back to walking as if I feel like I am in control of myself it gives me the confidence to deal with what ever challenges the future will bring.