Monday, April 27, 2009

confused

last day of my holidays today back to work tomorrow and I know it sounds bad but I am really kind of glad as these holidays have been very difficult for me dont get me wrong i've done lots of good things but they have also made me miss Donn so very much and really i am feeling very confused about everything. One of the grannies made a comment on one of my layouts that has me thinking.... the problem is I really have no idea what to do to help deal with my loss is scrapping layouts of Donn the right or wrong thing to do I am even wondering if maybe i need to stop scrapping entirely for a while am I just making it harder for myself by spending so much time scrapping and writing about my feelings and memories should I just not look at all my photos and not spend time on my computer. Am I in denial that Donn has gone by continuing to scrap layouts of the two of us is it making it harder for me to stop missing him so badly. I guess I just wish I knew what is the "normal" thing to do some times I think I feel so overwhelmed by the loneliness that I am going a bit nuts.

4 comments:

loonyhiker said...

I think if scrapping and writing about your memories helps you, keep doing it. If it helps you keep him close to your heart, it is good. I also think the important thing is to keep balance in your life though. Don't let the scrapping and the writing interfere with the rest of your life. Don't let it keep you from joining the real world. Maybe you could set aside a couple of hours to do the scrapping and writing and make yourself do other things outside of that time. These are just my thoughts. You are in my thoughts and prayers daily! (hugs)

The Lundys said...

loss and grief isn't normal! don't box yourself in, i say just do what you feel, even if it doesn't feel good, it will help you. (((hugs)))

Elisabeth said...

Carolyn I know that a flood of good memories comes over you when you pick up each photo or work on each layout. I'm sure you smile through your tears while you scrap. Only you can know what good it does you or what harm. I'm inclined to think it's good or you wouldn't have picked it up again so soon.
I know blogging here is a good tool for working through your grief, and I'm glad you are able to, instead of locking it all in. Scrapping may just be an extension of that, writing down the memories but adding the photos too. Keep on smiling through your tears, Carolyn; there is so much to remember to smile at.

Beth said...

There is no right or wrong answer Carolyn. Some times we DO need to take a break, get some perspective, take a look around the world. Some times we do NOT need a break but need to have an outlet to get the emotions out.

I think of you often Carolyn.